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I've been thinking about this quote by 17th century English philosopher John Locke often in recent days and weeks, and I have found that it applies quite fittingly to many arenas of life, both to us each individually, but more broadly to society and how it evolves. 

A brief history lesson on Locke. It was Locke who, while in agreement with Thomas Hobbes, an elder English philosopher regarding the social contract and one's obligation within a society and the reciprocal responsibility of the government to its people, took the understanding one step further: If the government broke their part of the contract, the people (those that put the government in office) could rise up, speak up and hold the government accountable. Albeit, the practices of MLK and Henry David Thoreau's civil disobedience is what should be adhered to if effective, civil check and balance is to be struck, but what if we applied this concept to our own lives? What if we stuck to contracts, promises we made to ourselves, and if we didn't keep them, we held ourselves accountable? It seems somewhat peculiar as it would be hard to objective, but aren't we the only one's who know when we aren't on the course we wish to be on? Aren't we the only ones who know when we could have done better? Food for thought most definitely, but I want to move on to the original thought I wanted to share.

Getting back to the original quote from above: new opinions behind held suspect. Again, taking the quote and applying it to our individual lives, if we take a new way of living and we vow to incorporate it into our lives, initially, we tell ourselves, "No problem. I've got this." But the reality is we will face resistance. It's natural, it's to be expected and upon running up against such resistance we shouldn't give up. Why? I'll just say it again, change provokes the spontaneous and unconscious response of objection because it is unknown and unfamiliar. 

If you are someone who has been hurt in the past in relationships or friendships or life in general (who doesn't have at least one experience of being hurt?), but truly, if you are someone who has been battered by rejection, disappointment and pain when it comes to your attempts to be vulnerable, your mind can create an automated response of defensiveness, even cynicism. And upon meeting someone new, the defenses go up, you begin to automatically think the worst and then the self-sabotage begins. You may not beat yourself up, but you perhaps assume the worst in the other person. You assume they are going to hurt you, and so you send your mind down the negative track of pain and suffering before it has even begun, before the good had a chance to begin. 

It can be extremely difficult to entertain a new opinion that hasn't worked for us in the past. But here is the crucial piece to consider, you are a piece to the puzzle of your life, a significant piece. And if you change, the rest of the puzzle will change as well. Perhaps you take some time to work on you, to become more adept at reaching out and engaging with people more likely to be healthy and secure. Perhaps you take some time to master your mind so that you can halt it when it wants to go off on a side path that will lead to nowhere helpful. Perhaps you do the necessary work of becoming your best self, and when you do, you will want to accept new opinions about how to approach life if the way you had been living previously wasn't working. 

It's not easy to approach life in a different fashion, different attitude and a different perspective. It has to be conscious and it must be done consistently. Eventually, it will become habit, but initially, it will require you to be attentive and determined to overlook the uncomfortable feelings of making yourself vulnerable, or simply doing something different in which you do not know how it will work out. 

Currently, I am shifting my approach in a few areas of my life, and while I am excited, I am tentative. It's new, it's different and it's like nothing I've ever experienced. But if I want a different outcome, I have to approach situations in a different manner. Are you with me? We can do this. We all can do this if we indeed are seeking a change to something that isn't currently working.

Speaking of change, let's talk money. 

In this week's episode of the podcast, the discussion of "Money: How to Know If You Have Enough" offers more than a handful of questions and habits that will ensure you will be able to discern quite clearly if indeed you have enough or are at least on the right path to having enough. And while tax season is right around the corner, so we will need to take a close look at our finances, it wasn't all talk about money this week on the blog. Style was talked about in an extra Style Inspiration post as well as eight of my favorite beauty products. And that's just the beginning. A new recipe, a supermodel's Amsterdam apartment, the Hygge conversation begins and more.

i do hope you enjoy the newsletter and thank you again for subscribing. Wishing you a lovely weekend and until next week, I'll see you on the blog.